Sustainable Positivity

Positive mental health has become a very popular topic in recent years and it’s fantastic to see such variation in the ways in which positivity is promoted- in this way, there’s literally something to suit everyone. One of the questions that I get asked by clients just starting therapy is “how can I maintain feeling positive?” The answer is that no one will maintain a positive mood all the time. Life is not perfect, nor should we expect it to be, but for many of us life is good in a broad sense. We have a comfortable standard of living and if we compare ourselves with those less fortunate than us, it can be so easy to count our blessings. Why then do we often lack a sense of contentment and appreciation for all that we do have?

Well, firstly, we live in a busy world, with little down time and a steady flow of information about everything that is going on in the world around us – most of it negative and sometimes downright fear-inducing. Our brains are working hard every day to process all of the incoming information as well as staying on top of the list of things we need to do. In more primitive times we would have had regular periods of rest during the day to lie around and let our brains process all this information, but this is certainly not the case now. These days when we do get a break, we generally turn to our devices to check social media feeds, return messages and generally get sucked in by mindless scrolling.

However, these historical natural periods of day-dreaming were so important. Almost by accident, Neuroscientists discovered that the brain is extremely active when we are thinking of nothing in particular. (PDF) Common Blood Flow Changes across Visual Tasks: II. Decreases in Cerebral Cortex This almost trance-like state activates a “default mode” network that seems to process memory and helps with forward planning. This is very similar to the important functions that occur nightly during REM sleep.

In Solution focused Hypnotherapy we explain to clients that maintaining a healthy ‘stress bucket’ is largely dependent on adequate sleep at night. Adequate sleep at night however, depends equally on having a manageable ‘stress bucket’. Unfortunately, many people suffering some form of insomnia or chronic stress already have a stress bucket that is out of control. The way we can ensure we tip the balance to allow sleep to do its job processing our emotional stress is by ensuring we are not accumulating unnecessary stress during the day. We do this by deliberately bringing our awareness to the positive areas of our life, ensuring we have a healthy, balanced perception of our everyday life. This allows us to sleep better, feel emotionally lighter, more energised and better able to cope with what life brings. Giving ourselves short spells of mental rest during the day is also helpful, even as little as 20-30 minutes to take a breath of fresh air or sit and have a cup of tea while doing absolutely nothing else will make a huge difference.

So you see, being positive is not really a way of life. As one client said to me recently, “It’s not so much about putting on rose-tinted glasses as taking out the darkly tinted lenses”. However there does seem to be some truth in the fact that the more you focus on the positive, the more positive you will see and that’s good news for everyone. Whichever path you choose to thinking more positively, remember to go easy on yourself on the days that are tougher. Ups and downs are natural – it’s balance that’s important.